Things Looking Sonny For Bizarro Grey Albright
Okay, this is weird, but Sonny Gray and I are complete opposites. Sonny Gray is in Bay Area, and it's Grey Albright in Los Angeles. Weather you like it or not, that's weird! Pun noted too! Grey...
View ArticleTwo-Start Starters, Week 9: (Ariel) Miranda Rights And Wrongs
I was originally excited to focus on Baby Thor Mike Clevinger in my first post taking over the Two-Start Starters for M@, but the rainout on Thursday threw everything out of whack. So, I had to pivot...
View ArticleVince Vaughnlasquez……………And The Top 100 Starters
Does anyone remember when Vince Vaughn was funny? It was a time long ago in a land far, far away, your wife was still dating guys wearing Armani Exchange shirts, and George W. Bush was using words like...
View ArticleWax On, Wax Off Dinelson …And The Top 100 Starters, Week 10
So let's just get this whole curse thing out of the way. Seems like every starter I've profiled since taking over this here gig has hit the DL, with lone exception being Luis Severino. Some how he's...
View ArticleTwo-Start Starters, Week 12: Take Your Chances with Francis?
Another week, another Clayton Kershaw start pushed to Monday. At least this week they moved the start before I wrote and submitted this article. If they move it again Saturday morning, then I will be...
View ArticleOne If By Land, Three If By Seager
Our Commissioner Manfred presses his intercom, "Please escort in the Guatemalan baseball stitchers." Manfred's secretary brings six men dressed in blanket ponchos and straw hats. Their leader steps...
View ArticleBeltre First Texas Ranger To Reach 3,000 Hits Since Chuck Norris
Adrian Beltre was promoted to the Dodgers the same year I moved to Los Angeles. I distinctly remember listening to AM sports radio a lot that summer, and, man, did people in LA hate Beltre. With...
View ArticleGodley Outadverbs Wrigley & The Cubs
The Book of Job says, "We will send out at least one email a day to all your contacts whether you like it or not." Shoot, I immediately see what I did wrong there. I Googled for a Bible quote, and...
View ArticlePujols Reppin The 609
If you hail from Central New Jersey, sorry. I didn't mean to get your hopes up. Albert Pujols does not represent the 609. If you are a Ludacris fan, sorry. Pujols may or may not have garden hoes in...
View ArticleMLB Wakes Up Prospects For New School Year With Cup Of Coffee
Maybe because I am not Prospector Ralph aka Endorphin Ralph aka The Prospector aka Prospect Jesus aka Peter, Paul and 'I Know Prospects' Mary Well aka The Pro-Spectulator aka I Am Still Not Beating...
View ArticleA Fish Called Miranda
Ariel Miranda pitched a no-hitter yesterday through six innings and 112 pitches that had to be the worst six-inning no-hitter in baseball history. Shame the M's removed him before he gave up a hit,...
View ArticleBryce’s Breakneck Beginning Beats Back Broken Bats
There's no greater compliment I can give a player than I wish I owned him in every league. Okay, maybe a higher compliment is I wish he'd married my mom and been my dad, but then he'd be old and I...
View ArticleJeter Blew Up the Marlins But Needed Sean To Newcomb
Hope everyone had a nice Mother's Day! Or, as it's known in my house, Bill Hall Day. *it's 2074, Grey Albright's frozen head is on a shelf next to Ted Williams' frozen head* "Hey, Ted Williams,...
View ArticleWacha Snell The Rosarios For Once
From Fozzie Bear's Big Book Of Side-Splitting Jokes (Please Laugh), "Why couldn't you hear the guy who didn't draft Michael Wacha? He was Mike-less. Wacha Wacha Wacha." "Did you see him pitch...
View ArticleAmbulance Chasers, Week 12: New Rule, Pitchers Can Only Pitch
This one just came across my desk in the Razzball news room. Apparently Walker Buehler suffered this injury (rib microfracture) three starts ago (!) but he’s a hockey player who fought his way through...
View ArticleBatman Turner Overdrive
Yesterday, Trea Turner hit his 10th and 11th homer, contributing 8 RBIs, touching home plate three times for those jimmies (what they call runs on the east coast) and hitting .280 on the year. Feels...
View ArticleBauer Keeps Finger On Reds’ Pressure Point Until Cody Drones On
Yesterday, Trevor Bauer continued to keep the drool moist on his owners' chins -- 8 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 12 Ks, ERA at 2.30. The other day some 'perts listed their biggest surprises of the 2nd...
View ArticleWe’re All On A Break (But Matheny’s Will Be Longer)
*visoring your eyes with your hand, squinting at the light as you emerge from your mother's basement* "Hey, mom, it's the All-Star break and I thought I'd come up to say hello." Where the house once...
View ArticleAmbulance Chasers, Week 21: To Hellickson and Pax-ton
Jeremy Hellickson, SP, Wrist Sprain: After missing most of June with a DL stay, Hellickson finds himself back there again, this time with a more serious wrist injury. Hellickson has had an interesting...
View Article2019 Spring Training Positional Battles: The NL East
NL West | NL Central | NL East | AL West | AL Central | AL East I don't pay much attention to Spring Training Statistics. You never know who the statistics are coming against. Baseball-Reference did,...
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